Open Post: Hosted By The Teaser Trailer For “Venom”

That could be a picture of Tom Hardy waking up from a horrible dream in which he got a Leonardo DiCaprio tattoo and realized IT WASN’T A DREAM, but it’s actually Tom in the first official teaser trailer for Marvel studio’s Venom. This ain’t your mama’s Venom! The college freshman geek charm of Eric from That 70’s Show has been replaced with an angry Tom Hardy in a hospital gown.

Venom isn’t scheduled to come out until October, so there will be at least 10 more trailers. Hopefully one of the trailers will explain the questions I have. Like: Can a basic MRI screening pick up magic angry spider genes? Did Michelle Williams have to put down a damage deposit to borrow Nicole Kidman’s wig from the set of Big Little Lies, or is she on the honor system? Could they not have set up the trailer to mimic one of those daytime TV malpractice lawyer ads? “Did you wake up as an angry buff man-spider and now you’re drowning in medical bills? Call me for justice.

And for an even-less-human version of Tom Hardy, here’s his wax figure that was unveiled today at Madame Tussauds in London. The Evening Standard says it also has a “soft, warm torso with a beating heart.” It’s probably a good thing they positioned his arm over his crotch. I have a feeling a lot of guests would check to see if every part of him was soft and warm.

Pics: YouTube, Wenn.com

25 Comments

  1. boredasfuckyo

    SCOOOOOTTTT!

  2. If he’s bothering animals that can’t breathe, people need to report him for animal cruelty or something instead of just wondering why he won’t stop. He seems really psycho.

    Also, exactlyhow much hair is he combing forward? Why not really shock us and reveal the bald spot?

  3. Ooh good point!

  4. LookieLookie

    Looking good, Dee! I kept wishing that Green Man or Day Man would show up at the game.

  5. I understand that they’re upset, but suicides basically happen because someone is in a low moment. She was an entertainment executive, she had resources. She could’ve called a crisis line, gone to the emergency room, checked herself into a psych ward or rehab for treatment.

    I’m not trying to say that this isn’t sad, but I think her family is lashing out because on some level they’re afraid they could have done more. Which they couldn’t. This was a choice she made, instead of tons of other choices she could’ve made.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.c

  6. irreverence

    My Garcia has actually stolen bags of chips off of the coffee table, and stuck his head in my Burger King bag for the fries. Won’t touch things for cats, but salty human snacks? Totally his vice.

  7. Her preference was Ruffles.

    https://uploads.disquscdn.c

  8. LookieLookie

    Barenecessities.com is where I get all my bras for my hard to find bra size. They have a great range of hard to find sizes.

  9. My Sasha loved potato chips!

  10. LookieLookie

    What’s a good bra?!? I have to spend a minimum of $60-80 on any bra in my size 😭😭😭 (but really, 34F/G size breasts will never feel comfortable in a bra in my experience) I’ve yet to bite the bullet and buy/try a $120 one because of the principle of the matter (can only find my size online). UGH bra shopping and prices!

  11. Unify Normal

    The hair – Georgia wore it better.

  12. Lefemmenikita

    Ah.

    Logan Paul is one ugly mfer.

    The only close famous celeb resemblance to him would be
    https://pbs.twimg.com/media

    If Beeker were run over by a truck though

  13. CaliCheeseSucks

    I think it is meant to be physical resemblance – but GE is one of the sweetest ladies in Hollywood.

  14. LookieLookie

    I know 32 year olds with a 9 year old with CP and MS, among other disabilities, and the father has a ton of health issues himself. Neither parent is even overweight, let alone morbidly obese! Excuses, excuses, excuses (while leaving her child with CP and her baby with no parent, SMH).

  15. Lefemmenikita

    I’m a bit slow here….

    what is the connection?

  16. Lefemmenikita

    I suppose you guys can still hang out?
    https://scontent.fpmr1-1.fn

  17. irreverence

    I totally understand. I’ve had a shockingly similar situation to yours, and I know ALL of those feels. I had an extremely friendly stray/lost cat show up at my front door one day. We took him in to get him out of the winter, not sure if we would keep him or just foster him, but he was ours for the time being. His first checkup seemed fine, but within a month, he was declining. Turned out he had FIP (a common virus, corrupted into deadly form), and his very cellular structure was breaking down. Even knowing that, I still broke down at the idea of letting him go. We hurt so that they don’t have to anymore. He found a person as kind as you for a reason, and got one last big dose of love and kindness in his life…as well as someone to mourn and miss him, which he clearly deserves. Big, big hugs to you. Thank you for what you’ve done and what you’re going to do.

  18. Oh, I just meant that all the posting stopped at once all of a sudden. It was weird.

  19. Spray on abs

    Strange can be good. What gives?

  20. irreverence

    LOL this is not how this would go down in my house. My cat likes chips more than he’s ever liked any cat treat I’ve bought.

  21. irreverence

    Fucking oxygen thief. I don’t know what’s worse, the “ideas” he makes into videos, or the people who support him by watching them.

  22. Spray on abs

    The only thing left for him is porn. Preferably porn where he gets tased and poked repeatedly.

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