Jimmy Buffet No Longer Lives The Margaritaville Life

If there is one person who single-handedly kept the babysitting industry alive in the 90s, it was Jimmy Buffet. He was the universal bad night out for mammas and papas everywhere looking to get away from the kids, down margaritas at the bar, and get freaky with Pam from accounting just around the time Jimmy got to singing the bridge in “Margaritaville.” Alas, the ‘ville sounds like it’s going through a heavy drought right now, as Jimmy says his fuddy duddy diet is keeping him from half the shit he sings about in his song.

The New York Times profiled Jimmy, and it sounds like his no-sugar, no-carb diet means he can’t imbibe on the frozen sweet cocktails he made famous (no, Bethenny Frankel, it wasn’t you). He does drink tequila on the rocks, but he douses it in water. He also no longer smokes pot! Something I didn’t know, but apparently everyone else did, is Jimmy supported himself in the early days by smuggling marijuana from the Caribbean to Florida. Where’s THAT version of Breaking Bad, AMC?? Instead of hitting the good kush, Jimmy said he’s now just that annoying guy in public who occasionally vapes.

Jimmy has also embraced commercialism. He left Key West because he felt it was getting too commercial. But now he lives at the Time Warner Center in Manhattan and loves it.

He likes being on Columbus Circle. Central Park is right there. But also, can he just say it? “I love the mall.” He eats at Bar Masa and gets coffee at Bouchon. He likes to visit the Cole Haan, hoping that one day he’ll find the right boots for a New York winter. He stops in at Bose to see what kind of new headphones they might have. But also, his whole adult life he’s been touring, and in practically every city, there’s a mall. When you don’t have a home base, the sameness of a shopping center can be a comfort.

Before your mom starts to sob thinking she’s never going to get her annual day of buying some weed off the neighborhood kid who cuts the grass and heading to a Jimmy concert, it doesn’t sound like he gives a shit if his Parrotheads toke up and sip the sauce. It’s mainly that he’s more business mogul than beach bum as of late. Jimmy runs a chain of casinos, hotels, and restaurants under the Margaritaville label and has a Broadway musical, Escape To Margaritaville!, on the way.

While it’s not a problem for audience members to get sloshed, it might raise some investor eyebrows if Jimmy walks into a board meeting smelling like a freshman dorm and slurring about the good ol’ days of outrunning the Coast Guard to give South Beach its spring supply of Mary Jane!

Pic: Wenn.com

25 Comments

  1. just me...πŸ’˜πŸ’Œ

    Sorry..posted about that before I read down one more post…Outback buy in partnership worked great for the original partners….after that they flooded the market with to many restaurants and still getting a buy in for a proprietor of 10K and taking all of his/her individual decisions for their location away.

  2. just me...πŸ’˜πŸ’Œ

    It was ran by Outback Steakhouse group.

  3. just me...πŸ’˜πŸ’Œ

    Should see the streets in PA after the Eagle Super Bowl parades.

  4. just me...πŸ’˜πŸ’Œ

    I love all of his stuff..use to listen to it on my 1976 transistor radio Christmas gift.

  5. That is hilarious, not surprising and a little sad (kinda like him).

  6. Thank you

  7. I use to work at his restaurant in Ft. Lauderdale, Cheeseburger in Paradise was owned by Outback. Side note Our head store manager got fired for embezzling money. Then the manager replacing him sold his share to a new manager because he knew the store would close. Really morally strong people…. Also customers use to be so heavy they wouldn’t fit into any of the booths, even the large 6-8 seater booths.

  8. I worked at Cheeseburger in Paradise (his burger themed restaurant) in Florida when I turned 18. I had actually never heard of Jimmy Buffet before working there. Most of my coworkers were ok and I enjoyed the job, but listening to Jimmy Buffet non stop and dealing with the Parrot Heads (what Buffet fans call themselves) was really obnoxious. After working there a year I still never got why people liked his music, or him, for that matter. So it’s no surprise he’s a boring old white dude who likes to shop at malls.

  9. Jimmy Buffet fans = baby boomers who are having mid life crisis with horrible taste and are incredibly boring.

  10. Random Flux

    The guy has two or three songs that are fun to hear/sing live and that’s it.
    Most of what he writes all sounds the same.

    He actually wrote a musical a long time ago and it absolutely sucks.

    I only know this shit because my S.O. is a ‘parrot head’
    Ugh.

  11. Bruins Dirk

    Oh lawd. LOL

  12. Christ…I’d rather listen to a wet, bellowing fart erupting out from Kim Kardashian’s putrid corn wagon than endure listening to Jimmy Buffet. That shit is just horrid.

  13. *hands Krimpy some chocolate*

  14. They really weren’t that good, but, I hadn’t had a fry in YEARS so they were great to me.

  15. Be gone. Peh!

  16. Marianna Graham

    please, all outdoor general seating concert goers leave trash, don’t put heat on Marg Man!

  17. DollGrrlTrixie

    potatoes are gluten free because they’re not wheat… DUH.

  18. That’s a good one. One of his best.

  19. Whoa I thought he died for a second there reading the headline. Yeah I would imagine that catches up with you after a while. It’s funny he thought Key West was getting too commercial and moved to an extremely bustling and commercial area of NYC.

  20. lunarcamelco

    There were a few articles last year about him launching a line of Jimmy Buffet retirement homes.

    https://www.billboard.com/a

  21. lunarcamelco

    Oh god, Billy Joel is the pits. Theeeeeeee worst.

  22. que cochina

    I don’t know her (!), but I’ll take your word for it!

  23. que cochina

    Bueno, gracias! Mr QC and I are having the yard landscaped. The guys should finish up manana. It’s looking muy bonita and should be really pretty in a few months. We’re having exceptionally warm Feb in Californy. I hope we get more rain soon. Are you going to PS this spring?

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