Shakira And Gerard Pique Might Have Split Up

Reports from Barcelona and Colombia are claiming that feminist inspiration Shakira and her futbol-playing baby daddy with the footlong penis Gerard Pique have called it en paz. According to Spanish site Cotilleo (via Sports Illustrated), Pique’s very bad week began with boos and hisses coming from his former fans for publicly supporting Catalonia trying to secede from the rest of Spain. And it ended with Shakira allegedly dumping him and embracing the prospect of allowing men back into her videos.

(Oh, and as for that Catalonia thing. Fun fact – Catalonia is considered an autonomous nationality in Spain, and it consists of four provinces – Barcelona, Girona, Lleida, and Tarragona. They’re currently trying to make a “Brexit” for it. Pique is from Barcelona and is the centre-back for FC Barcelona and Spain’s national team. Pique has reportedly offered to quit Spain’s team due to the backlash. And wow, this Dlisted gig takes me to new places like Catalonia and forcing myself to read about sports.)

A source close to Shakira “confirmed the separation.” They’ve appeared to be on the rocks for some time now and were last seen together publicly in June at the wedding of one of his teammates in Argentina. Maybe Shakira had a come-to-Gloria Steinem moment and realized that she’s not a goal to defend before she had to leave him by faking her own death in a ridiculously complex manner. (Seriously, didn’t that whole fake drowning plan seem kind of unnecessarily convoluted to you?)

However, on the official side of things, Shakira’s publicist released a statement to Spanish magazine HOLA! saying Pique is still defending her goal (via 101 Great Goals).

Shakira and Gerard Pique’s relationship is still going strong. “Everything is the same,” the singer’s publicist confirmed to HOLA! in response to the recent reports that pair have ended their relationship.

The publicist confirmed that the claims are “only rumors ” from people “who want to harm Pique.”

Shakira and Gerard have two children together – Milan, four, and Sasha, two. They’ve been an item since 2010 after he appeared in the video for Shakira’s song for the 2010 FIFA World Cup.

I’m new to Big Peen Pique and I have to say I’m not sure how Shakira was even able to leave the house to exit the relationship. I’ve been looking at photos of Pique and goddamn, when he’s home you must have to climb over that thing to get to the door.



  1. Not as glamorous as it looks like! I’m normally working 24/7 when I’m there

  2. I don’t think he hates Spain, he just thinks he doesn’t belong there, but Catalonia. I mean, happens the same in other places around the world (I’m thinking Scotland or Wales, for what I know of)

  3. ThenTheLordMadeYolettie

    I never heard much about her really lengthy relationship with the Argentinian. His dad was president, iirc?? Idk what he was like .

  4. ThenTheLordMadeYolettie

    No flipping way!

  5. lovesicecream

    Ewwwwww…forgot about the foot thing !

  6. lovesicecream

    Yeah…she has the “you smell like outside” aura about her in this video.

  7. Ronaldo’s talented, but he’s a massive Diva. One could find hundreds of gifs of him either making bitchy/overly dramatic comments about decisions on the pitch, or him seeking too much recognition from his teammates. He seems insecure, self-obsessed, and exhausting to be around each year.

  8. CinnamonGirl

    This gif lmao

  9. BarbaraMillicentRoberts

    the entirety of Spain is gorgeous.
    I do have a soft spot for Barcelona due to some super sessy memories from holidays there as well as Gaudi’s architecture.
    Do make sure you can communicate or understand some rudimentary Spanish though as French, English, or Italian will not get you far when communicating in certain areas.

  10. BarbaraMillicentRoberts

    …. zlatan😻

  11. frenchielover

    I think that dick has a mind of it’s own.

  12. claudia mastro

    not true

  13. claudia mastro

    what are u ppl talking about? i live in roma and never ever heard anyone commenting anyone . of course if americans start to shout or talk loud caus intoxicated well t’s normal to comment that thing and say “shut up americans” cause here it’s very uncommon to see young folks drunk (only in san lorenzo district) and especially not at 19,00! drunkness is largely associated not to fun and light hartness but to bad behaviour and so someone may say “yankee go home” or things like that but that’s not racism, in my opinion,

  14. Yes it is!

    Crispy Ronaldo pausing to question himself…

  15. Came here for this!! (since it was not linked in the article, ahem.)

    (Obligatory whenever Shakira is the topic of conversation btw.)

  16. claudia mastro

    What ???? I’m Italian and never heard of it lol I mean the striptease part lol ahahah 😆

  17. Bucky Shitpeas' Taint Miasma

    Fucking feet in a food preparation area, urgh.

    This bit, on the other hand

  18. Bucky Shitpeas' Taint Miasma

    That’s always bothered me a bit, the rest of Spain doesn’t really care, they’ve got their own shit to be getting on with.

  19. Bucky Shitpeas' Taint Miasma

    The separatist movement is actually quite broad across the political spectrum.

    They’ll just go back to party lines should they get their way.

  20. Bucky Shitpeas' Taint Miasma

    That’s been going on for a long while now, a few years ago I taught business English in Madrid and a lot of Catalán companies already kept offices there, just in case

  21. Bucky Shitpeas' Taint Miasma

    [cries in Spanish]

  22. Bucky Shitpeas' Taint Miasma

    There’s plenty of that in many sports.

  23. IMO. the elites want to keep the EU. It serves their purpose to stay united. Unfortunately, it has not serve the people well. Headquartered in Brussels the elites make rules for many of the EU countries. And that’s why Brits voted them out; even though the elites wanted to stay in. I’ve been watching the EU for the last 7 years. It’s falling apart! Denmark and especially Sweden has become the rape capital of Europe.
    Just google it if you don’t believe.) Sweden’s government have abdicated responsibility?? Brussels is fine for business but don’t go out alone at night if you’re a women. Greece? Lol, everyone is and has always financially supported Greece, which is becoming quite a drain. Haven’t followed Spain’s involvement so I plead complete ignorance. France considered as a universal economic failure. Germany is on its way to being F up.
    So much more to say.

  24. Immodest Goddess

    She looks like a little wolf child

  25. Heathen the Horrible

    He seems crazy. Like restraining order crazy

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