Mariah Carey’s Ex-Choreographer Speaks About Her DGAF Ways

As we’ve seen over and over again, Mariah Carey hasn’t necessarily been giving 100% in her performances of late. I’d clock her at somewhere around 2%. Given that breathing and sustaining a pulse are autonomic nervous system functions, the additional 2% effort is basically just enough for her to remain upright with her eyes mostly open. Sad to say, the old rhinestoned mare ain’t what she used to be. Well, Complex has a theory about what might be at the root of Mariah’s less than stellar performances and it’s not because somebody has been slipping her quaaludes; she fired her longtime choreographer Anthony Burrell.

Complex reports:

So what happened? As it turns out, there might be a pretty simple reason for the change in Mariah’s recent shows. In January, almost immediately after the New Year’s Eve fiasco, Mariah fired Anthony Burrell, her now-former choreographer and creative director.

Does that mean that her new dance captain has been showing Mimi videos of psychologically wounded elephants trapped in inappropriately small enclosures at unregulated foreign zoos and telling her “just do that“? No, according to Anthony (who is shady AF), it takes more than just dance moves to get Mariah moving. Anthony said:

“Working with an artist like Mariah, who’s not a mover first, it’s always a challenge to get them to think physically and not just vocally. You always have to keep in mind that they’re a singer first. The priority is not teaching them 100 counts of 8, or endless routines. I wanted to give Mariah a modern push to revamp her, give her a fresher, more modern feel, make her more aware of her body and her lines, and not look like her feet hurt when she’s walking.”

You see, Mimi’s not a “mover” nor has she ever been. To hear Anthony tell it, Mariah needed him to push her and give her simple moves that she could execute with ease. He thinks her new team are too green and inexperienced to know how to get her to move her lazy ass. Anthony went on:

“You’re a legend. But you don’t care, your team doesn’t care. They’re not guiding and directing her. She’s back to where she was before. It’s not like she’s never looked this bad before; I just stepped her game up.”

Need proof that she was always a garbage dancer? Here’s a side by side comparison of yesteryear Mimi (tipsy cousin doing the electric slide at a wedding) and today Mimi (senile grandmother who woke up on a stage surrounded by sailors and just went with it).

Anthony added:

“It’s just typical Mariah. Mariah is clear: when she doesn’t wanna do something, she doesn’t do it. She’s performing with lackluster and no fucks given, and it’s taking away her star.”

Why don’t you say what you really, mean Anthony!? I think Anthony is the one with no fucks to give. He’s moved on to dancing and doing choreography for Parkwood Entertainment, which is Beyonce‘s crew. Meanwhile, Mimi is currently a “very special guest” on Lionel Richie‘s All The Hits tour. Hopefully somebody in Lionel’s crew has rigged her Spanx with a little something that can give her periodic zaps to keep her on her toes. Or at the very least on her feet.

Pic: Instagram

25 Comments

  1. Girth Crooks

    This is why even though she has about 1/4 the vocal ability and has a good decade on her age wise Madonna can still tour and sell out shows while Mariah has to tour with Lionel Richie. She still gives a shit and works her ass off for her fans.

  2. craigypants

    Mariah. We have no interest in your honey snatch anymore.

  3. Mrs. Iris Rainbird

    And nothing traps that yeasty fustiness better than some warm, dank orthopedic pantyhose. Steamy. Mimi is soooooo sexy. Hang it up honey.

  4. Green Smurf

    Julie Andrews is the perfect example. After her botched surgery they thought she’d never sing again, but she worked it and came back. It’s not like it used to be but she’s still amazing.

  5. craigypants

    I wrote about this in yesterday’s open post. It’s even worse than NYE and the crap she served up last week. Look at this with her mic, its BA, BA, BA. Shes a fucking lazy bitch.
    http://www.news.com.au/ente

  6. Weird that she fired the choreographer after the NYE debacle, because i thought that particular issue was due to her ear piece not working…so that would be her sound guy/gals fault. Not the choreographer.

  7. monkeysntypewriters

    A friend on FB shared an article about how some researchers looked at old footage of Enrico Caruso and even while singing he smiled, looked relaxed, and his neck muscles were at ease. Back then, vocal chord injury/damage was unheard-of.

    Then it became a trend to *force* singing to be an athletic activity. Footage of singers today shows straining neck muscles, bulging veins, and faces full of effort. It’s all in the training.

    [Maybe it was an article in The Guardian UK about Adele’s surgery???]

  8. MadeMOISELLE

    I just spent ten minutes reminiscing about quaaludes…what was this story about again?

  9. These stars really must not save anything. Or maybe they just can’t get enough of the attention? If it were me I’d be living somewhere tropical doing absolutely nothing, enjoying my millions.

  10. Her dancing is just embarrassing….

  11. She was my go to music in the 90’s, so it’s disappointing to see her star fall.

  12. A waste of money! Nope

  13. Berry Melon

    Hilarious, that made me LOL. I have a cousin who is obsessed with Mimi and she would pay anything to see her. Actually she paid a lot to see her a few years back and went backstage to take a VIP picture with her. I assured her that these stars don’t like taking pictures with fans, and it’s all fake smiles, but she didn’t believe me. Basically MC signed her signature on anything given and you couldn’t record or take pictures. I like Mimi she’s a total diva, but I too would not pay to see her show, I would watch old videos of her for free on YouTube.

  14. Berry Melon

    I can just imagine, her reaction “Darhling!”

  15. Yeah. If he hadn’t had constipation and was paying so hard, maybe he wouldn’t have died like he did. So says the Autopsy guy.

  16. I agree

  17. Oh hell no!

  18. Agree! I did read that most of the people went to see Lionel anyway. He apparently put on a good show. I wouldn’t bother to see mimi for free !

  19. littlegreen

    I wouldn’t pay to see her, but I do consider her a tragedy.

    She HAD a one in a billion talent. Her music was never my jam, but she had the voice for anything.

    She threw it away. Happens all the time. Fame brings out the worst in many people and makes them batshit.

    If only I had opened The Littlegreen Center for Ego Rehabilitation… she’d never wear pantyhose again.

  20. I would demand my money back. People are stupid to see her. Speaking of concerts, let me just say Guns N’ Roses put on the best concert I’ve ever seen! And they’re old as fuck. I went last week. I was blow away. What’s Mimi’s excuse? She has none. She needs to retire

  21. Champagne has corroded her vocal cords

  22. Hahahahahaha poor Elvis!

  23. Fat and cannot sing. Yep

  24. And sitting on a couch singing. Stop trying to dance and prance around. But even her voice is shit these days. Like I said earlier, I wouldn’t pay $5 to see her overrated ass.

  25. Someone needs to slap her into reality.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*