As Michael K pointed out when he called my attention to this item, you’d assume that “pizza parlor fight in Toronto” would be two polite Canadians saying, “No, sir, you order first, please” to one another over and over again. Everything in Canada is magical, and every Canadian I know is a sparkling gem from the north. I don’t lie. There’s nothing bad in Canada, except maybe a serial killer or two, and whatever evil spirits possessed the Canucks involved in this brawl.
Reddit (via blogTO) brings us footage of the war that broke out at a Pizza Pizza location in Toronto (“near Queen and Broadview Plaza” if you know the area). Legend has it that a late order caused a patron to jump over the counter and “throw around some potato chips.” That’s when it all went to hell! Women grapple. Chairs are picked up in hopes of being thrown. That one gal was pissed because she was punching people to STOP the fight. There is so much going on here, it’s like they all caught a shared madness and are each acting out some private trauma. This Twitter user was right:
you can watch that pizza pizza fight once a day and catch different moments you missed the last time you watched ??
— July 28th ? (@iamcameronmoore) July 12, 2017
Is Pizza Pizza good enough to inspire such brutality? Watch below and judge for yourselves.