1. RyanSeacrestShouldBeLynched!

    Kim Kardashian finally found toilet paper capable of wiping her ass.

  2. Pre-emptive wipe.

  3. Ew! Mr. Cruise…just towel off and give us our $600.

  4. Just in time for Mother’s Day

  5. What I imagine Johnny Depp’s dingleberry situation is.

  6. President Lincoln’s quill holder should have been a clue.

  7. First Playboy says no nudes and now they change the bunny tail!??!

  8. Miagirl1122

    The only white elephant gift that makes sense

  9. FluffKitteh

    John Travolta’s home remedy.

  10. FluffKitteh

    Gives a new meaning to “blow it out your ass”.

  11. punched lasagne

    well tain’t that special

  12. “Customer Service? I asked for the PEZ dispenser, not PREZ.”

  13. Before “Proctologist” was shortened to “Proctor,” Mr. Gamble wasn’t sure of his choice of partner for the Kleenex empire.

  14. VeryOldSyntheticBabyBat

    Did I shit myself or just die laughing ?

  15. Tim Franklin

    Mr. Simmons, that’s not how sperm banks work.

  16. Tim Franklin

    Paper or plasdick?

  17. VeryOldSyntheticBabyBat

    Mothers Day at Fox News

  18. pippitypup

    No wonder they’re called ‘Puffs’.

  19. pamorama_j

    Literally squeezing the Charmin.

  20. pamorama_j

    You really need to take care of those dingleberries pal.

  21. When you pull out the tissue, the lotion comes out the front.

  22. Blow it out your ass!

  23. anonymousey

    wow taking photos is usually not allowed in david miscavige’s main cos office.

  24. That taint Kleenex…

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