The Trailer For “Jackie” Starring Natalie Portman Is Out

 

The powers-that-be released the poster for Jackie today, and it looks like the album cover for Natalie Portman’s 1960s-style jazz album of songs inspired by Jackie Mason jokes. They also released the trailer, and in the first 35 seconds, Natalie Portman looks like a wine drunk me on a Saturday night while trying to get through an episode of Bloodline Boreline as my eyelids fall into the sleep position. Natalie’s facial expression machine is firmly set to: Lana Del Rey song.

Natalie is eyeballs deep in the sads in most of this trailer, which makes sense, since her husband was just assassinated in front of her. Jackie follows Jaqueline Kennedy’s final days in the White House after JFK’s death. It comes out in December and also stars Peter Sarsgaard (as Robert F. Kennedy), Greta Gerwig, John Carroll Lynch (as Lyndon B. Johnson), Beth Grant (as Lady Bird Johnson), Max Casella (as Jack Valenti), Billy Crudup, Richard E. Grant and John Hurt. If you want to expose your ears to Natalie Portman doing Jackie Kennedy’s voice, then here you go:

She sort of sounds like a soft-spoken Cartman on downers. And it took me forever to figure out what she was saying at the end. Natalie Portman is a False Idol Award winner (and I’m sure she’ll be nominated for this too), so she obviously did her research and knows how Jackie pronounced “Camelot.” But I kept thinking to myself, “A Cadillac?! A camel toe? A candle lot? A Camel Light? Girl, do you need a cig? Just say so!

 

 

25 Comments

  1. My ma loved camelot and shit. When I was about 4 I crayolla’d all over her Jackie O signed thank you picture and she would bring it up from time to time. Just to let me know- it was never forgotten.

  2. LOL, behave!!!

  3. So was the movie.

  4. HAHA and PUUUUKE! 😛

  5. diana really was horrible.

  6. Miss_Betroot

    “Natalie Portman Mesmerizes as Jacqueline Kennedy in ‘Jackie’ First Trailer”

    http://variety.com/2016/dirt/r

    Everything I read about this film has the same sort of views on it. Don’t get it.

  7. Emily_loves_vino

    sorry bitches, it just. doesn’t. work.

  8. FrijidBarjot

    We all tried it with Primark lololol!

  9. Speaking of horrible biopics of famous dead people, remember when Naomi Watts put on her Camilla wig and pretended to be Princess Diana. You don’t? I don’t blame you, but I always thought had Charlize Theron played the role it would have been quite the movie. Both tall, beautiful, and I think Charlize could have pulled off that innocent yet newly found devious side Princess Di had later in life. #Casting Choices https://s-media-cache-ak0.pini

  10. MayorChapStick76
  11. This new movie completes the trifecta (except it’s actually meant to be stunning)!

  12. if you’re going to play someone then do it right!

    http://www.monologuedb.com/wp-

  13. Tan Mom's Revenge Fries

    I thought she went with him for the security.

  14. I would actually pay to see that! 😀

  15. OH God forgot about this mess!!!

  16. diana was painful.

  17. Petty Officer Diana Prince

    Shout out to Angelina + Kim!
    http://www.hippoquotes.com/img

  18. Oh shit really?!!!! I’ll have to go and check out Lidl’s own then! *incognito of course, I don’t want to be mistaken for a poor*

  19. bbqcornnuts

    As do I, but what can you do?

  20. Yeah it might have been in Clint Hill’s (Jackie’s head bodyguard) book? Pretty good read

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